Wednesday, January 5, 2011

The Keys To The Kingdom

Key I lose things on a regular basis.  I especially lose vital things like my glasses, gloves, the white-handled knife we use to use to cut pizza and, even more important, my keys.

A few years back I bought a new car.  At the time, I had a really bad cold.  I picked up the car on a Monday, drove it home, took the keys out of it and went into the house and put them down.  Because I was so sick, I didn't drive the car again for another three days.  So, there it was 6 a.m. and I needed to go to work keys.

No matter, I'll just use my second set of keys.  And off to work I went.

I have not found my main set of keys yet.  I still maintain they're in the house somewhere, but Mr. Ivy says they're buried deep in the middle of the local landfill.

Big deal, it's just a set of keys, right?  WRONG!  Not only was the leather tag something my late Dad made for me, but on that ring was the spare key to Mr. Ivy's car.  So what, we'll just get a replacement, right?  The replacement for my new car key was $1.79.

Well, Mr. Ivy's got a SMART car.  That means there's a little chip on the key that will allow the car to start.  To replace this key costs about $60.  To program the key costs another $40.  (Boy am I glad I have a stupid car!)

It's been a real pain in the butt not having a key to that car.  If I have to use it, I have to take HIS keys, which means he shifts into total paranoia mode.  WHAT IF YOU LOSE MY KEYS???!!!

It's a possibility.  I've been known to stamp through the house, swearing a blue streak as I search for my keys or glasses only to find them IN MY HAND!!!

Now you might think this is the first sign of dementia, but I've been doing this for the past 25+ years, so I think we can rule that out.  What's the answer?  My Dad always said my head was full of Tommyrot.  (Stories, songs, the weather, the cost of pork won tons, etc.)

I think he was right.

I lost my keys again this past week (they were in my seldom-used coat's pocket) and decided enough was enough.  It was time to get a second set.  We went to Home Depot and had copies made to all the keys to the kingdom (except for Frank's car).  I'm good to go again.

Until I lose this set of keys.

What do you lose on a regular basis?

No comments: